LOVE ONE ANOTHER

JOHN 15:12-14, 17

FEBRUARY 11, 1996

 

Most would agree that there is a lot of talk about love in our day, but not a whole lot of demonstration of love. Less talk and more action would create a wave of change in our land when it comes to love.  Perhaps one of our biggest problems is that our understanding of what true love is does not concur with God's Word.  Leon Morris offers a good explanation of Christian love to help us see this.

Love in the Christian sense is not sentimentality; it is not a gushing, emotional indulgence of some loved one.  Love is what we see in the cross.  It is what Christ showed when he laid down his perfect life for sinners.  It is important to bear in mind that it is love for sinners.  Jesus does not mean the kind of love that we so commonly have in mind when we use the term, a love for someone whom we find supremely attractive (sinners are not attractive to a holy God).  Nor is it a love for those bound to us by natural ties, such as family members (God is not bound by natural ties to sinful people).  Nor is it the love of friendship, a love drawn out from us by those we find congenial (God does not find sin or those who practice sin congenial).  A love for sinners means a love that proceeds from the fact that God is love; he loves because it is his nature to love.

 

And redeemed sinners love because it is their nature to love.  Not their old sinful nature, but the result of the "new creation" that takes place when they put their trust in Christ (2 Cor. 5:17).  That means a complete transformation....I imagine that this transformation is never one hundred percent in this life.  But every real Christian knows that Christ transforms.  And the closer we live to God, the more loving we become.  We who are  Christians love, but not because it has been our good fortune to come across some highly attractive people.  We love because we have become loving people ourselves, people who love because we have been loved, not because of the merits of the people we encounter on our way through life. (Expository Reflections on the Gospel of John, 523-524)


In the larger context of these verses we see that Jesus speaks extensively of the hatred the world has for Him and for those who are His true followers.  A sharp contrast develops as you read through this entire chapter.  On one hand, those who are genuine in their relationship to Christ will have the distinctive practice of love characterizing their lives.  And on the other hand, the world apart from Christ has the distinctive practice of hating Christ and His followers.  The difference is found in the nature of Christians as opposed to the nature of the world.  A nature that has been regenerated by the Holy Spirit whose fruit is love, cannot help but to demonstrate genuine love.  A nature that remains in bondage to Satan and the corruption of the flesh cannot help but demonstrate hatred.  Love is foreign to an unregenerate nature, while love is natural to a regenerated nature.

 

It is significant for us to realize that this teaching on love came as our Lord prepared for His death and soon-to-come ascension back to heaven.  In John 13, as the Gospel unfolds the scene of Jesus washing the disciples' feet at the Feast of the Passover, we see Jesus demonstrating love.  A little later in that same chapter our Lord mentions that He has a new commandment to give them:  "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another.  By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another" (13:34-35).  As Jesus continued His discourse with the disciples, we find Him speaking of love for Christ and obedience being tied together in chapter 14.  Now, again in chapter 15, we are reminded of our need to love Christ (15:9-10) and to love one another.  We can fairly say that love for Christ and for one another is one of the central teachings of Jesus Christ.

 

If Jesus spent so much time demonstrating love and teaching on love, then we must make the practice of Christian love a priority in our lives.  How do we do this?  I believe our text can help us see how to love one another as Christ desires us to.

 

I.  Love Commanded

 

If love is natural for a regenerated person, then why does our Lord have to command us to love one another?  That is a very fair question!  There are some characteristics which become supernaturally natural to the believer as part of his new nature.  He is a new creation in Christ.  As a new creation, he now has a totally different character being shown through his same personality.  This is called the fruit of the Spirit.  Chief among the facets of the Spirit's fruit is love.  We can love because we now have the Spirit-endowed capacity to love.

 

Yet, with all of this, we are still commanded to love, just as we are commanded to rejoice (joy), to be at peace with all men (Rom. 12:18), to be patient with others (Rom. 15:1; II Tim. 2:24), etc.  While these characteristics are natural to the Christian, they must be nurtured, developed, and exercised.  The Holy Spirit gives us the ability to exercise these things, now we must do it.  We are not machines that operate when the switch is turned on and quit when the switch is off.  We are vessels through whom the Spirit of the Lord has implanted a new nature, so that we live with a newness of mind, disciplining ourselves in every Christian grace. 

 

So when we are commanded to love, our Lord is commanding us to do something that is within our capacity as new creatures in Christ.  He is not telling us to do something which we cannot do, rather it is something which He has implanted in us that He wants worked through us.  We cannot shut out our minds and wills to live the Christian life!  We must renew our minds constantly through the Word of God and the application of the Spirit.  We must exercise our wills in doing those things that are God-honoring.  We must persevere in living out every demand upon us as Christians.  And rightly so, for as those who have been redeemed by the precious blood of Jesus Christ, we cannot do less!

 

Now we face this command, "This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you."  What is implied by this command to love one another?

 

1.  Action as well as affection

 

Generally, we think of love as an affection.  It is considered to be a warm feeling toward someone else, the kind that makes you feel happy inside.  But that does not convey the biblical idea completely. 

 

I certainly concur that the idea of love has within it "affection."  For instance, in Ephesians 4:32, we are told, "And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another even as God in Christ has forgiven you."  The word "tenderhearted" (EUSPLAGCHNOS) literally means, "having healthy bowels," since the Greeks considered the bowels as the seat of emotions and affections.  This verse, which certainly conveys the beauty of Christian love, shows that affection will be involved.  There is to be a tenderness in our feelings toward one another, a kindness in our words, a warmth in our treatment of each other, a delight in being able to minister to each other.  All of this falls in the realm of affections.

 

The Christian community will do well to have a fresh dose of affection toward one another!  Everywhere you turn, you see Christians accusing each other of all sorts of things, jumping down one another's throats, speaking coarsely, cutting and criticizing one another.  The old adage is true, you will catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.  We need more honey in our relationships!

 

But let me hasten to add, our affections must not be devoid of action.  Love, in the biblical sense, is chiefly an action rather than simply affection or feeling.  The word for love (AGAPE) is in sharp contrast to other words commonly used to express love in that century.

 

The Greeks would speak of a passionate love that might even be conveyed in sensual terms through the word EROS.  They could speak of a kind affection for others in the word PHILOS.  But AGAPE was different.  They used it very little because the Greeks did not understand the idea of selflessness in their religion.  They centered everything on themselves.  They were much more at home with EROS than AGAPE.

 

But AGAPE carries a different weight in the whole concept of love.  It must be thought of as unselfish action toward others, giving to others what they need without regard for selfish gain.  The story of the Good Samaritan illustrates AGAPE, this kind of love which Christ admonishes us to practice.  The Samaritan did not see the man suffering by the roadside and go on a campaign to complain of how the man's own people neglected him.  He simply acts in order to come to the man's aid.  He does not think of what it will cost him or how this man might infringe upon his plans, he just sees a man in need and selflessly meets this need.  Does it cost him?  Certainly, in terms of time, effort, concern, and even finances it costs.  But it is well worth it for the Samaritan for the pure delight of loving another person.  Jesus tells those who listen to this parable, "Go and do the same" (Luke 10:37).

 

Our action in love will lead to a...

 

2.  Practice as well as a profession

 

All of us appreciate being told that we are loved.  A profession of love is vital, especially in family relationships and even in church family relationships.  There have been some very special times in my life as a pastor when a brother or sister tells me that they love me.  Perhaps it has been while under duress or facing the strains of the ministry and someone comes along side and expresses their love for me and my family.

 

Such expressions or professions of love are important to us.  It is something which we can all put into operation more often.  Do you regularly profess your love for the members of your family?  When is the last time that you have told another member of God's family that you love them?  We often have difficulty with this fearing that we might be misunderstood or fearing that we might fail in our love.  Yet such warmth of words helps to ease the pains of this life.  The security of knowing that you are loved by others, and loved unconditionally, gives great encouragement to go on in life.

 

Perhaps we have had a rather negative experience with professions of love.  Has it ever happened to you that someone professed their love for you but did not show it in practice?  There are few pains that sting the heart any more than the hypocrisy of a profession of love.  It seems that such professions have become trivialized in our day highlighted by a series of beer commercials and the line, "Hey, I love you, man."  The words that actor expresses are empty and vain.  His aim is selfish indulgence.  The vanity of his words are clear.  Yet strangely, we laugh about what this guy says and make him a national hero.  It seems that it is okay to profess love but fail to practice it.

 

But that is not what our Lord had in mind when He commanded us to love one another.  The word is a present tense verb, showing that love is to be the dominating, constant activity in our relationships.  It is not a quirky sentimentalism, but a merciful, selfless action toward each other.  It is constant.  Love exercises a strong will power, showing action when facing opposition, going forward in the face of adversity, demonstrating its good even when unappreciated.

 

Such love was shown by the Apostle Paul to the church at Corinth.  We have been studying First and Second Corinthians in our Sunday School classes.  One of the chief things that we have seen and will see, especially in Second Corinthians, is the opposition Paul faced from a large, vocal group at Corinth.  There were people who essentially campaigned against Paul and his ministry.  They denied his apostleship, sought to contradict his teaching, and questioned his sincerity.  In cases like this, the average person would have dropped the Corinthians 'like a sack of hot potatoes!'  Yet, the Apostle continued confessing his affection for them and showing his love for them by his prayers, his counsel, his good wishes, his gracious teaching, his transparency, and his desire to see them again face to face.  Truly, when he spoke of love in I Corinthians 13, he practiced it!

 

Are you doing likewise?  My friends, it is easy to love those people who will love you back or who will always be kind to you or who constantly do things for you.  But how about those people who are difficult to love?  What about the guy who is arrogant or the gal who is prideful or the young person who is rebellious, do you love them?  This points us to the third element of this command...

 

3.  Specific as well as general

 

"Love one another," the words ring, unfortunately, like the monotony of a school bell.  Yes, we talk about loving one another.  Yes, there are posters and even billboards that proclaim this message.  Yes, it is found on the marquees of churches.  But what does it really mean?  How far does it demand that I go in loving others?

 

Love can be expressed as a whole attitude of heart that is to be displayed toward the brethren.  John makes a general statement in I John 3:14, "We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brethren.  He who does not love abides in death."  I would call this love in general, that is, we have an overall thought and attitude of love toward those who are our brothers and sisters in Christ.  As we have seen, it is more than just words, it is action as well.  For some of us, it is rather easy to love in general.  We can say, "I love the folks at South Woods," and be quite sincere in that statement.

 

The trouble comes when we have to love specifically.  "Love one another" is a singular statement.  It is a specific love for individuals, not simply the corporate body.  I see this strongly brought out in John's First Epistle.  "The one who loves his brother [singular] abides in the light and there is not cause for stumbling in him.  But the one who hates his brother [singular] is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going because the darkness has blinded his eyes" (2:10-11).  Again, he repeats this singular emphasis in love, "By this the children of God and the children of the devil are obvious: anyone who does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor the one who does not love his brother [singular]" (3:10).

 

Interestingly, John follows this last verse with an illustration of Cain who slew his brother Able.  He tells us that "we should love one another; not as Cain, who was of the evil one, and slew his brother" (3:11-12).  Here is the point, Cain probably loved his family in general, but not in the specific. 

 

The challenge that each of us face today in regard to our text is clear, we must love one another individually, 'warts and all!'  Some of us are hard to love.  Others of us are perhaps easy to love.  As brethren in Christ, we must not single out the easy-to-love and avoid the hard-to-love folks.  The call of Christ is for us to expand our expressions and actions of love toward even those who may not reciprocate by loving us.

 

Let's test ourselves for a moment.  What actions of love have you shown toward those who are your closest friends in this church?  Probably, that's not too hard to think of.  But let's go deeper, who have you shown love toward that is outside your close circle of friends?  Who have you loved in this body that perhaps you consider to be unlovable or at best, hard to love?  What have you done in terms of acts of kindness, meeting needs, demonstrating compassion toward someone that you may not even like to be around very often?

 

We must not be content with a love that just caters to our buddies!  Our love must stretch its boundaries to be truly loving 'one another'.  Can we be passive about such love?  Jesus did not tell us to love when we got around to it.  He did not say to love if someone shows love to you.  He instead tells us to pursue such opportunities of loving one another, letting this love be the pattern and practice of our lives.

 

II.  Love Clarified

 

To be told to love is one thing, but to understand what this love is can be quite another.  The disciples would not have argued that they needed to love one another, neither would we.  What is the alternative, 'Hate one another?'  None of us would want to be guilty of such a practice, so we would all agree that we need to love one another.  But how does this love act?  Jesus makes this clear in the next few words of our text.

 

1.  Parameters of love

 

"Love one another, just as I have loved you."  If we were looking for some kind of guideline for love, we have it in these words.  Christian love is not wild and uncontrollable.  It finds parameters in the example of Christ's love.  If we want our love to be on target, then we need to seek to love others in the same way that Jesus loves us.

 

Do you recall that occasion where Peter was trying to be spiritual in thinking that when someone offends him, he is to forgive up to seven times before exacting vengeance?  I can almost see the proud apostle, daring to forgive an offender up to the seventh time.  But Jesus rebukes Peter's concept of forgiveness with the striking statement that he was to forgive up to seventy times seven, that is, in unlimited fashion.  This, my brethren, is loving as Christ loved.  He who forgave us, did so without limit.

 

How about the time (John 6) the multitudes came out into the wilderness area to listen to Jesus teach?  Do you recall what transpired during that event?  Here were thousands of peasant people listening to the teaching of Christ in the piercing Galilean heat.  They were famished after spending hour upon hour in the wilderness without food.  Then Jesus met these people at the point of their need, miraculously feeding them by multiplying the loaves and fishes.  Here is the point of love:  Jesus Christ gave these desperate people precisely what they needed.  He took action to relieve their suffering, to meet their need, to provide for them.  This is love, according to Jesus Christ, when we meet the needs of others at our own energy and expense. 

 

There were those numerous occasions when the crowds of people pressed in upon Jesus to be touched by Him or to receive from Him.  They longed for healing, deliverance, or some other physical, mental, and spiritual need being met.  Day after day Jesus would toil among these people, most of whom were not serious about following Him.  They wanted what Jesus could do for them, but they did not want to take up the cross and follow Jesus.  Yet, Jesus ministered to them anyway, demonstrating for us the selflessness of love in action.  If you want to love as Jesus loved, then actively meet the needs of those who may not do anything for you in return.

 

Look at the example of Christ with the disciples.  Could you ask for a more unlovable bunch than those twelve guys?  Peter was brash and harsh.  James and John were arrogant.  Thomas was skeptical of whatever Christ said.  Judas Iscariot was a betrayer.  Yet, look at the patience of Christ with these men!  Look at how He took time with them, even when it seemed that they were just not understanding what He taught.  Look at the compassion He had for them.  Look at the way He protected them and forgave them and consoled them.  If you want to love with Christian love, then do to one another as Christ did to His disciples.

 

2.  Extent of love 

 

The parameters of love show us the width and breadth of Christian love, loving as Jesus loved.  But v. 13 shows us the length or extent of Christian love.  "Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends."  Christian love does not have a stopping point.  It goes to the extent of sacrificially dying for others.

 

In a day when selfishness rules, it is unusual to hear such a striking statement as that of Christ in this verse.  He did not just talk about love, but fully demonstrated it by His sacrificial death on the cross.  What He did, He did willingly on behalf of those who did not deserve such display of love.  Yet in that display of love is our redemption.  His death was not an act of sentimentality nor great inspiration, but a specific action that brought to us deliverance from sin and eternal judgment.  Paul expresses this clearly in Ephesians 5:1-2, "Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children; and walk in love, just as Christ also loved you, and gave Himself up for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God as a fragrant aroma."

 

We must consider a few pointed applications from this statement.  First, sacrificial love means that we are willing to be inconvenienced in order to demonstrate our love to others.  Love will not always fit into your schedule or routine.  Sometimes you will have to go outside of your comfort zone to love.  Loving one another may cause you to miss some personal indulgence or entertainment. 

 

Second, sacrificial love means that the person is worth more than the price to be paid.  Love is costly.  We have to decide that people mean more to us than whatever cost it takes to love.

 

Third, sacrificial love means that you must discipline yourself to exercise the qualities of love.  Though love is part of our Christian character, there are many facets to it that must be honed and sharpened.  If you want to see this clearly displayed, go back and re-read I Corinthians 13 where we have the finest description of love.  For instance, "Love is patient, love is kind, and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant...."  We must discipline ourselves to show patience, kindness, and to refrain jealousy, boasting, or arrogance.  This kind of discipline means that we agonize in prayer and apply the truths of the Word until such qualities of love are operating in us consistently.

 

Finally, sacrificial love means that you may one day be called upon to lay your life down for someone else.  You may suffer in order to show love to another.  I read an interesting story of how this kind of sacrificial love was displayed.

After the U.S.S. Pueblo was captured by the North Koreans, the eighty-two surviving crew members were thrown into a brutal captivity.  In one particular instance thirteen of the men were required to sit in a rigid manner around a table for hours.  After several hours the door was violently flung open and a North Korean guard brutally beat the man in the first chair with the butt of his rifle.  The next day, as each man sat in his assigned place, again the door was thrown open and the man in the first chair was brutally beaten.  On the third day it happened again to the same man.  Knowing the man could not survive, another young sailor took his place.  When the door was flung open the guard automatically beat the new victim senseless.  For weeks, each day a new man stepped forward to sit in that horrible chair, knowing full well what would happen.  At last the guards gave up in exasperation.  They were unable to beat that kind of sacrificial love. (Illustrations for Biblical Preaching, 226-227)


If we are to show such sacrificial love to others, we cannot think we can neglect being inconvenienced or neglect disciplining ourselves in the display of love's qualities.  We may think we would rise to the occasion of great sacrifice, even martyrdom, but if we cannot love in the simple ways God has afforded us now, we will not love in the magnanimous ways that may be ahead of us.

 

3.  Relationship of love

 

The command to love is brought full-circle with the relationship of obedience.  "You are My friends, if you do what I command you....This I command you, that you love one another" (vv. 14,17).  We cannot separate obedience and love.  They go hand-in-hand.  It is those who have learned to walk in obedience that will best demonstrate Christian love. 

 

An unbeliever can hear a sermon on love and be inspired to give himself in loving others.  There have been countless examples of this sort of attempt at love, which we often call philanthropy.  But what Christ calls for in terms of love can be distinguished by what accompanies it.  A philanthropist may be an outright pagan, but he happens to show some generosity toward others (e.g., John DuPont IV, who provided money for athletes, police department, etc., yet has been charged with murdering one of the athletes he had shown "love" toward).  But true Christian love is wrapped in devoted obedience to Jesus Christ.

 

It is not love or obedience that is demanded.  Instead, it is love because of faithful obedience that is to be practiced.

 

When you try to love apart from a life of obedience to Christ, then you are merely a sentimentalist.  Your love will have loopholes.  Your love will not satisfy.  Your love will not stand before the judgment bar of God.

 

An obedient life gives you a foundation for proper love.  It keeps your love from being an extension of self-interest.  It purifies your love so that it is not hypocritical and deceitful.  Attempts at obedience without love is legalism.  There are few things that can dampen your spirits and discourage a church more than a legalist.  One the other hand, attempts at love without obedience is mere sentimentality.  Such love is empty, useless, and wasted.

 

Conclusion

 

The call to Christian love is within the context of abiding in Christ as His disciple.  It is only as you are living in dependence, trust, and obedience to Jesus Christ as the living Vine, that you can be a vessel through which He might display His love.  And in essence, that's what Christian love really is.   Such love does not originate in us, but in Him who regenerates us and gives us life.

 

You and I are called to love as Christ loves us.  Can we be passive about the demands and disciplines of the Christian life, yet still practice such love?  That is an impossibility!  The call to love is at the same time a call to take seriously the demands of the gospel.  As John put it, "Little children, let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and in truth" (I John 3:18).  The Apostle Paul's pray on behalf of the Thessalonians is my prayer for all of you today, "May the Lord cause you to increase and abound in love for one another, and for all men, just as we also do for you" (I Thess. 3:12). 

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